🌈Q&A (No. 17)
Q7: Has religion/spirituality had any kind of affect on your journey to accepting yourself (good or bad)? If so, how does that affect your view and/or practice of religion/spirituality today?
A: I feel like my sexuality has increased my oneness and understanding of God our creator. Many in the community feel rejected or unaccounted by God but due to how I am perceived by the rest of the world it has made my faith stronger that there is no child left behind in God’s eyes. I feel our perception of people is like many tests from God; how would you treat this person if you knew God was within in them vs. if you did not know if God was within in or using them as a vessel. I take pride in being a strong in my faith and who God has allowed me to reach due to learning how to be confident with who I am and who I am becoming.
Q10: When people say they accept you, what are some green flags that indicate that they do? What are red flags that indicate that they don’t? When it comes to people showing support, what is your biggest pet peeve(s)?
A: There is a very strong line between accepting and respecting. For the people that accept me and respect me, because I feel those should go hand in hand, I realize that my sexuality is not at the forefront of our conversations. There’s no “big deal” associated with who I’m attracted to or love. However, I’ve found that the people who claim to accept me but do not respect me tend to ask questions out of ignorance. My biggest pet peeve is the question “who’s the boy in the relationship” as if I’m not a woman in love with a woman. Although the question is intended as harmless, it has in the past increased my insecurities with how I look, dress, wear my hair, etc. to not be perceive as a “boy.”
Q12: On a scale of 1-10, how difficult has it been to navigate (platonic, familial, etc) relationships with heterosexual/cisgendered individuals? How do you hold space for those around you?
Q13: On a scale of 1-10, how difficult has it been to navigate (platonic, familial, etc) relationships with individuals of the LGBTQ+ community? How do you hold space for those around you?
A12/13: Being Bisexual woman is very hard for me in the LGBTQ+ community however “easier” for me in some aspects in the heterosexual community. In the LGBTQ+ community is hard to be considered “serious” about who I am attracted to because there are assumptions that most Bi women only like women when intoxicated or in a sexual manor. Whereas, in the heterosexual community bi women are constantly sexualized in terms of pleasing men! Because men “gain” an attraction between two women together and knowing the women have the capacity to be attracted to them it is more “accepted.” However, I have realized for both communities I hold spaces differently. In the LGBTQ+ community, I’m confident and do not allow people to tell me how they perceive my sexuality or how I present myself. In heterosexual communities, I use the time to educate and break down the either natural or intentional ignorance people I interact with may have. Both spaces serve as a learning experience for not only me but others as well.
"Both spaces serve as a learning experience for not only me but others as well."- Anonymous, Bisexual
